These are so hilarious. Got it from www.bootstrike.com.
Travel Centre
Customer: "I've been ringing 0700 2300 for two days and can't get through to enquiries, can you help?".
Operator: "Where did you get that number from, sir?".
Customer: "It was on the door to the Travel Centre".
Operator: "Sir, they are our opening hours".
Breathing
On another occasion, a man making heavy breathing sounds from a phone box told a worried operator:
"I haven't got a pen, so I'm steaming up the window to write the number on".
Right Click
Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop".
Customer: "OK".
Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?".
Customer: "No".
Tech Support: "OK. Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"
Customer: "No".
Tech Support: "OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?".
Customer: "Sure. You told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'".
Time Machine
Caller: "I deleted a file from my PC last week and I have just realized that I need it. If I turn my system clock back two weeks will I have my file back again?"
Nothing on screen
This has got to be one of the funniest things in a long time. I think this guy should have been Promoted, not fired. This is a true story from the Word Perfect Helpline, which was transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care department. Needless to say the Help Desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the Word Perfect organization for "Termination without Cause".
Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee. (Now I know why they record these conversations!):
Operator: "Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?"
Caller: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
Operator: "What sort of trouble??"
Caller: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."
Operator: "Went away?"
Caller: "They disappeared."
Operator: "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
Caller: "Nothing."
Operator: "Nothing??"
Caller: "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
Operator: "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??"
Caller: "How do I tell?"
Operator: "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen??"
Caller: "What's a sea-prompt?"
Operator: "Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?"
Caller: "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."
Operator: "Does your monitor have a power indicator??"
Caller: "What's a monitor?"
Operator: "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on??"
Caller: "I don't know."
Operator: "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??"
Caller: "Yes, I think so."
Operator: "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall.
Caller: "Yes, it is."
Operator: "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??"
Caller: "No."
Operator: "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."
Caller: "Okay, here it is."
Operator: "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."
Caller: "I can't reach."
Operator: "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is??"
Caller: "No."
Operator: "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over??"
Caller: "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's because it's dark."
Operator: "Dark??"
Caller: "Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window." .
Operator: "Well, turn on the office light then."
Caller: "I can't."
Operator: "No? Why not??"
Caller: "Because there's a power failure."
Operator: "A power.................................. .... A power failure? Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in??"
Caller: "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."
Operator: "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."
Caller: "Really? Is it that bad?"
Operator: "Yes, I'm afraid it is."
Caller: "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?"
Operator: "Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer."
True story from a Novell Net Wire Sysop:
Caller: "Hello, is this Tech Support?"
Tech: "Yes, it is. How may I help you?"
Caller: "The cup holder on my PC is broken and I am within my warranty period. How do I go about getting that fixed?"
Tech: "I'm sorry, but did you say a cup holder?"
Caller: "Yes, it's attached to the front of my computer."
Tech: "Please excuse me. If I seem a bit stumped, it's because I am. Did you receive this as part of a promotional at a trade show? How did you get this cup holder? Does it have any trademark on it?"
Caller: "It came with my computer. I don't know anything about a promotional. It just has '4X' on it."
At this point, the Tech Rep had to mute the caller because he couldn't stand it. He was laughing too hard. The caller had been using the load drawer of the CD-ROM drive as a cup holder and snapped it off the drive.
Prev: Guardian Angel
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Guardian Angel
This is from Jelvie:
You never know when your guardian angel will be there for you so I have to try...
People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.
When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for
that person..
When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet
a need you have expressed.
They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide
you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally
or spiritually.
They may seem like a Godsend and they are.
They are there for the reason you need them to be.
Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient
time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship
to an end.
Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away.
Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand.
What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire
fulfilled, their work is done.
The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time
to move on.
Some people come into your life for a SEASON, because your
turn has come to share, grow or learn.
They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.
They may teach you something you have never done.
They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.
Believe it. It is real. But only for a season.
LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons, things you
must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation.
Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person and put what
you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of
your life.
It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.
Funny Doormat
Got this from suck.uk.com.
One side says Come In and the other says Go Away.
Amazing isn't it?
Baby Kitin
I gave birth last August 25, 2008 with a cute Baby girl. Her name is Baby Kristin Ragay Veloso, we call her Baby Kitin. She's in heaven now and I miss her so much.
Credit Unions are CREDIT-able
Right for the times? "A credit union is a cooperative financial institution that is owned and controlled by its members, and operated for the purpose of promoting thrift, providing credit at reasonable rates, and providing other financial services to its members." (Wikipedia)
Inspiring...
I was looking through my tons of email when I found this email from Elaine.
How to Stay Young...there are Ten Things she sent me but number 6 really struck me.
6. The tears happen:
Endure, grieve, and move on.
The only person who is with us our entire life, is ourself.
LIVE while you are alive.
How to Stay Young...there are Ten Things she sent me but number 6 really struck me.
6. The tears happen:
Endure, grieve, and move on.
The only person who is with us our entire life, is ourself.
LIVE while you are alive.
Did I Marry the Right Person
Sent to me by Papa Bear (Berto), I want to share it to you.
Those who are still single may learn something from here...
Those who are already married may take it as a guideline to improve your marriage & relationship ...
DID I MARRY THE RIGHT PERSON?
During one of our seminars, a woman asked a common question. She said, 'How do I know if I married the right person?'
I noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so I said, 'It depends. Is that your husband?' In all seriousness, she answered 'How do you know?'
Let me answer this question because the chances are good that it's weighing on your mind.
Here's the answer.
EVERY relationship has a cycle. In the beginning, you fell in love with your spouse / partner . You anticipated their call, wanted their touch, and liked their idiosyncrasies (unconventional behavior/habit) .
Falling in love with your spouse wasn't hard. In fact, it was a completely natural and spontaneous experience. You didn't have to DO anything. That's why it's called 'falling' in love... Because it's happening TO YOU.
People in love sometimes say, 'I was swept of my feet.' Think about the imagery of that __expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something came along and happened TO YOU.
Falling in love is easy . It's a passive and spontaneous experience. But after a few years of marriage, the euphoria (excitement) of love fades. It's the natural cycle of EVERY relationship. Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse's idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts.
The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship, but if you think about your marriage, you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.
At this point, you and/or your spouse might start asking, 'Did I marry the right person?' And as you and your spouse reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else. This is when marriages breakdown. People blame their spouse for their unhappiness and look outside their marriage for fulfillment.
Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes. Infidelity is the most obvious. But sometimes people turn to work, a hobby, a friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances.
But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your marriage. It lies within it. I'm not saying that you couldn't fall in love with someone else.
You could.
And TEMPORARILY you'd feel better. But you'd be in the same situation a few years later. Because (listen carefully to this):
THE KEY TO SUCCEEDING IN MARRIAGE IS NOT FINDING THE RIGHT PERSON; IT 'S LEARNING TO LOVE THE PERSON YOU FOUND.
SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. It'll NEVER just happen to you. You can't 'find' LASTING love. You have to 'make' it day in and day out. That's why we have the __expression 'the labor of love.' Because it takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly, it takes WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make your marriage work.
Make no mistake about it. Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific things you can do (with or without your spouse) to succeed with your marriage.
Just as there are physical laws of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships. Just as the right diet and exercise program makes you physically stronger, certain habits in your relationship WILL make your marriage stronger. It's a direct cause and effect. If you know and apply the laws, the results are predictable. ... you can 'make' love.
Love in marriage is indeed a 'decision'.. . Not just a feeling.
Remember this always:
'God determines who walks into your life. It is up to you to decide who you let walk away, who you let stay, and who you refuse to let go.'
Those who are still single may learn something from here...
Those who are already married may take it as a guideline to improve your marriage & relationship ...
DID I MARRY THE RIGHT PERSON?
During one of our seminars, a woman asked a common question. She said, 'How do I know if I married the right person?'
I noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so I said, 'It depends. Is that your husband?' In all seriousness, she answered 'How do you know?'
Let me answer this question because the chances are good that it's weighing on your mind.
Here's the answer.
EVERY relationship has a cycle. In the beginning, you fell in love with your spouse / partner . You anticipated their call, wanted their touch, and liked their idiosyncrasies (unconventional behavior/habit) .
Falling in love with your spouse wasn't hard. In fact, it was a completely natural and spontaneous experience. You didn't have to DO anything. That's why it's called 'falling' in love... Because it's happening TO YOU.
People in love sometimes say, 'I was swept of my feet.' Think about the imagery of that __expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something came along and happened TO YOU.
Falling in love is easy . It's a passive and spontaneous experience. But after a few years of marriage, the euphoria (excitement) of love fades. It's the natural cycle of EVERY relationship. Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse's idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts.
The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship, but if you think about your marriage, you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.
At this point, you and/or your spouse might start asking, 'Did I marry the right person?' And as you and your spouse reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else. This is when marriages breakdown. People blame their spouse for their unhappiness and look outside their marriage for fulfillment.
Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes. Infidelity is the most obvious. But sometimes people turn to work, a hobby, a friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances.
But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your marriage. It lies within it. I'm not saying that you couldn't fall in love with someone else.
You could.
And TEMPORARILY you'd feel better. But you'd be in the same situation a few years later. Because (listen carefully to this):
THE KEY TO SUCCEEDING IN MARRIAGE IS NOT FINDING THE RIGHT PERSON; IT 'S LEARNING TO LOVE THE PERSON YOU FOUND.
SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. It'll NEVER just happen to you. You can't 'find' LASTING love. You have to 'make' it day in and day out. That's why we have the __expression 'the labor of love.' Because it takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly, it takes WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make your marriage work.
Make no mistake about it. Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific things you can do (with or without your spouse) to succeed with your marriage.
Just as there are physical laws of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships. Just as the right diet and exercise program makes you physically stronger, certain habits in your relationship WILL make your marriage stronger. It's a direct cause and effect. If you know and apply the laws, the results are predictable. ... you can 'make' love.
Love in marriage is indeed a 'decision'.. . Not just a feeling.
Remember this always:
'God determines who walks into your life. It is up to you to decide who you let walk away, who you let stay, and who you refuse to let go.'
Tell Me Something I Don't Know
On The Chris Matthews Show, November 16th Chris Matthews leads with: "`It's not my job.' We've got a financial Katrina on our hands. Recession and layoffs are pouring through the floodgates, and nobody's in charge. Bush looks retired, Barack Obama's not president. So who's protecting us?
"Mandate for change? When Reagan and Bush won, they charged ahead with a conservative vision. Will Obama do what Reagan and Bush did, do it big and bold no matter how tough the times? The Democrats are in the driver's seat. Shouldn't they drive?"
The panelists:
-- Michele Norris hosts "All Things Considered" on National Public Radio.
-- Howard Fineman is senior Washington correspondent for Newsweek.
-- Erin Burnett anchors"Squawk on the Street" and "Street Signs" on CNBC.
-- Michael Duffy's assistant managing editor of Time magazine.
"Mandate for change? When Reagan and Bush won, they charged ahead with a conservative vision. Will Obama do what Reagan and Bush did, do it big and bold no matter how tough the times? The Democrats are in the driver's seat. Shouldn't they drive?"
The panelists:
-- Michele Norris hosts "All Things Considered" on National Public Radio.
-- Howard Fineman is senior Washington correspondent for Newsweek.
-- Erin Burnett anchors"Squawk on the Street" and "Street Signs" on CNBC.
-- Michael Duffy's assistant managing editor of Time magazine.
Awakening the blogger in me...
Wow! Hanep sa title.
I've been down and out...no time for blogging, but I'm so back with vengeance, hahaha! I'm here in my mom's house browsing news on the web and blog hopping again...my second best past time, next to exasperating my husband (it happens only if he's busy playing PSP and watching TV).
We'll move out from their house in Laguna this weekend. I'm hoping that in our new place there's an Internet signal. But for the meantime, excuse me if i'll post several blog entries in a day. Speaking of moving out, here's a pic of the apartment:
It is in Sucat near our office. I'm a bit scared and excited. Scared, maybe because it will only be the two of us. I'm really used to having someone older than me in the house. Who will take charge of everything. Excited, because of the same reason that it will only be me and my husband. Yohooo! Hahaha! Can't help this dirty mind of mine. Anyways, its hard to start a new family. We need to buy things for the house...from broomstick, hanger to appliances and kitchenware. Well, new beginning.
I've been down and out...no time for blogging, but I'm so back with vengeance, hahaha! I'm here in my mom's house browsing news on the web and blog hopping again...my second best past time, next to exasperating my husband (it happens only if he's busy playing PSP and watching TV).
We'll move out from their house in Laguna this weekend. I'm hoping that in our new place there's an Internet signal. But for the meantime, excuse me if i'll post several blog entries in a day. Speaking of moving out, here's a pic of the apartment:
It is in Sucat near our office. I'm a bit scared and excited. Scared, maybe because it will only be the two of us. I'm really used to having someone older than me in the house. Who will take charge of everything. Excited, because of the same reason that it will only be me and my husband. Yohooo! Hahaha! Can't help this dirty mind of mine. Anyways, its hard to start a new family. We need to buy things for the house...from broomstick, hanger to appliances and kitchenware. Well, new beginning.
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